Anonymous

It’s been exactly one month since I lost my fiancée to a heroin overdose. I received the call from his father that he had passed in a restaurant bathroom and was found hours after his death. I’m still in shock and don’t know how I’ve made it a month already. He left 2 of his own children and two of mine. It was a struggle he battled for more than 20 years. I am not a user and often wondered why it was so hard to just quit. Today, after watching his struggle for the 8 years I spent with him, I know it was not a choice to be an addict, it was a disease he could not conquer or overcome. Not because he was weak but because the addiction had a hold on him that none of us did, he couldn’t do it for his children, me, his parents or himself. I do NOT want his death in vain, he was a great man with a kind heart. I will not let the addiction define him, he was so much more than that. I know he is free of the pain he endured every single day and is at peace. I am willing to take the pain and grief from his death so that he will not ever suffer again. I do this because of the great deal and love I have for him. Everyday is a struggle to breathe for me without him in my life, but knowing he is resting peacefully gives some solace to his death. I will continue to miss him terribly too I see him again someday. There needs to be more attention paid to this epidemic that is ruining the lives of some many people. He was only 37 years old with a whole life ahead…..I miss and love you my love!!!